


Ours

by ashleywritesthings



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Harry, Break Up, Daddy Kink, Declarations Of Love, Endgame Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Getting Back Together, Love, Love Letters, M/M, Making Love, Mutual Pining, Top Louis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-29
Updated: 2015-04-29
Packaged: 2018-03-26 07:45:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3842692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashleywritesthings/pseuds/ashleywritesthings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There was a box of letters underneath the bed they shared, and Louis needed to save what was left of he and Harry before it was too late.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ours

Louis knew he shouldn’t have been snooping around in the master bedroom of the home he shared with Harry. He'd been the one to willingly take the sofa for the four days Harry would stay before he went to LA. Louis caught himself still calling it their home, even if they weren’t LouisandHarry anymore.

He felt guilty, tiptoeing around the bed, looking in the closet, pulling out drawers desperately, he wasn't even sure what he was looking for but he knew there had to be something. Something in this room had to give him a hint, tell him how it got this bad, how they got this far apart, and something had to tell him how to fix it.

Harry had gone out for lunch with Niall and Louis knew he had about 3 hours before a buzzed boy with curls returned to the house. He’d stumble in and either look right through Louis; walk past him as if he didn’t exist, or he’d sigh and shrug his shoulders as he closed the door behind him, fall into Louis’ embrace and allow Louis to rub small circles into the skin on his arm until he fell asleep. Louis would hold him until he woke up when Harry would, for a moment, forget about all this and smile...but reality would hit him and he’d jump up out of Louis’ embrace and hide out in the room they used to share until he heard Louis leave with the slam of the front door. This is what they’d been reduced to, this is what was left of years of hidden love.

Louis was about to admit defeat when he allowed himself to fall to the floor of their bedroom, and when he turned his head to the left he found a small black box under their bed. He recognized it immediately, he’d seen it once in Harry’s bunk on their tour bus but it was a night when Harry was craving Louis and since those nights were so rare he all but forgot about it until now. He reached his arm under the bed until his hand found the box and he pulled it out, placed it on his lap and took a deep breath. Louis felt a bit like he was invading Harry’s privacy, and he probably was, but there was a time...not too long ago...that Harry’s mind, heart, and soul were Louis’; so maybe, he thought to himself, this was okay, if it would help get Harry back. He slowly opened the lid of the box and lost his breath when he saw letters, too many to count, all folded up with a small L on the front of each one. Harry, the boy who couldn’t even bring himself to look at Louis most days had been writing him letters, and Louis gave himself a moment to hope that this meant it wasn’t too late. He picked up the first letter and with gentle fingers he unfolded the paper and saw the elegance of Harry’s handwriting.

 

 

_My Dearest Louis,_

_I don’t know why I’m writing to you, you're asleep in the bunk right beneath me, sort of ironic since it’s been so long since you were physically underneath me, under my skin, but you're still kind of there somehow. You’re a part of me, you’re in my lungs and my veins and my soul Louis, you’re everywhere. I used to love the way I could feel you on my skin, the way I could taste you long after your lips left mine, how your voice resonated in my head but now all it does is remind me of all the ways I’ve lost you. I wake up every single day and I lose you again...this leg of the tour has been the hardest, and I never thought I’d have a box of letters of things I’m too afraid to say to you taking up space in my bunk but here it is, and here we are, and my heart is broken. I’m going to LA, but you already know this, and I don’t know how long I’ll stay...but I’ll spend my seconds missing you, the way I do now. I hope the fresh air and sunshine will help rid me of the pain associated with you, and then I’ll slowly be able to close the door on what we had, but it’s impossible to remove you from me entirely, so I’m giving myself a bit of time to learn how to live with your ghosts. The last time we kissed you tasted like rum and sadness, it’s a taste I’ll never forget._

_Sincerely yours (or not quite yours anymore)_

_H._

 

Louis was crying as he folded the letter back up and sat it next to him; so he’d found what he was looking for, in this box, in these letters there would be an explanation for how they got here, where Harry felt like he lost Louis along the way. Louis suddenly wished he’d walked directly out of their bedroom instead of searching for evidence that would only break him, but it was too late to turn back now. He pulled another letter out of the box and began reading it too.

 

_I used to live for the days we’d sneak off together, getting on a plane and flying to some hidden paradise for a couple days. The way your heart was so openly mine, the way mine belonged to yours, in these places where we didn’t have to hide what was never meant to be concealed. The way you walked around with nothing on because we didn’t have to wear any fake pretenses there, we didn’t have to be anyone but us, Lou and Haz. I wish we could go back there, maybe we shouldn't have skipped that vacation we had planned in December, is that when this truly hit the iceberg, is it when we finally admitted defeat even if we didn’t realize it? For me, I think it was, when I got that call I know I told you I’d almost forgotten about it and it was fine, but Louis...I already had my bags packed, and yours too...they were in the bottom of our closet that you never bothered going in to. I unpacked them that night and I wrote you the first letter, you’ll find it here, hidden beneath whatever else I’ve written and will continue to write until I finally give up. The day you receive this box is the day I’m giving it all to you so it’s no longer a part of me, that day...it’ll be too late._

 

Louis didn’t have it in him to finish reading that one, so he folded it back up and sat it on his opposite side, leaving it incase he found strength to read the painful words later. The next letter was less full of hurt, it must have been an earlier one when he still believed in their love.

 

_My Louis,_

_I miss you, maybe this is normal, you know? Like, normal couples have spats, they have days where they don’t get along. Nothing about our relationship has been normal so far, so maybe this is it, just...two people who spend too much time together and we mix work and pleasure and maybe this is just a rut. I’m probably being silly even writing these letters, I’ll throw the lot of them out when we get to spend some time together alone and everything falls back into place. I’m looking so forward to December Louis, so forward to just being able to stay with you alone, an entire week, I never want to leave the bed! I miss you, you’re asleep next to me and I miss you, but you sleeping here is better than you in your own bunk so I’ll take it. You’re restless even in your sleep, I wonder if your mind is plagued the way mine is. I’m going to hold you now, sorry this one is short, but as I said before, I doubt you’ll even need to read them. I love you. I love you. I love you._

_Yours forever,_

_H._

 

Louis folded that letter and placed it in his pocket, this one had hope, this one contained love, two things he’d been missing with Harry for months now, maybe that was the start of the way he’d get him back. Louis opened more letters, 6 to be exact, before he needed to get some fresh air. He placed them all back in the box, sans the one in his back pocket, and walked to the balcony off their bedroom. Part of him felt like he needed to be sick but the larger part of him knew he needed to take action. He’d gathered a few things from Harry’s words;

1\. Louis hadn’t been giving Harry what he needed in a long time.  
2\. Harry desperately tried to let Louis knew but he was too preoccupied to notice.  
3\. Louis had been the cause of Harry’s pain...that point was enough to break him entirely.

Louis knew getting sick wasn't an option, so he swallowed his sadness, along with his pride, and typed out a text to Niall.

'Hey lad, do you mind keeping Harry out until around 6, I’m sure there’s a match on that you could watch, or pints to be had...I just need a bit of time here without him.'

Niall replied immediately.

'He’s the kind of intoxicated where he's missing you, are you sure you don’t want me to bring him now?'

Louis had to force himself to type the reply he sent, because his heart was dying for Louis to say yes.

'I’m sure, just...need a few hours.'

Louis sat his phone down, not waiting for Niall’s reply, and gave himself a few moments to get his head back in the game. The few moments turned into an hour and a half and when he woke up he cussed under his breath at the time he’d wasted. Louis made his way back to the floor and opened the box, digging deeper until he pulled out three more letters.

 

_Louis,_

_I am so fucking sick of having to see you with her, I thought this would be long over by now but it makes my stomach turn to watch you put your arm around her shoulders or lace your fingers between hers. I’m angry today, I know this isn’t entirely something you love but the more time that passes the more comfortable you look with her invading your space. I just want you tonight, want to feel you inside me, feel your hands in my hair, your lips against my skin, your teeth on my neck. I want to hear you whisper filthy things into my ear until I’m begging you to wreck me, I wanna come untouched, just your cock in my ass until I can’t take it anymore. I want to see you fall apart too, turn my head over my shoulder and watch you whisper my name as you orgasm inside me, pulsing through my body. I want to curl into your arms and fall asleep with you telling me how good I am, how gorgeous I looked for you. It’s been so long Louis, so fucking long since you even touched me. I don’t know what happened, it’s driving me fucking crazy._

_Yours (and horny),_

_H_

 

 

Louis kicked himself, hard, after reading that one, knowing exactly what night it was written, their tour in Australia when he had to be seen in public with Eleanor, but instead of just hanging with her during the day, he invited her back with the lads that night and she was feeling as lonely as he’d been since the tension between he and Harry had been building, so when she leaned into him after a few drinks he just put his arm around her, and when she got up to go to the balcony he laced their fingers together and followed her out.

He had two more letters in his hand and only two hours until Niall and Harry had been set to return and he knew the moment was now or never. He shoved the letters and the box back under the bed before walking into their master bathroom to shower. He washed his hair with the organic shampoo Harry had purchased because it ‘smelt like roses and made Louis’ hair so soft’. Followed by the body wash with scrubbing beads because ‘how else is your skin going to get this clean?’ and then he stepped out and took a dryer to his hair because ‘the way the hair falls across your forehead when you blow-dry it makes my knees weak’. Finally feeling satisfied he walked into the bedroom and made his way to the closet, pulling out the red scoop neck shirt Harry loved on him and sliding into black skinny jeans, dancing to work them over his bum. He slid into a pair of vans and walked over to his phone before dialing Alberto’s number.

“Louis, good to hear from you lad, do you need anything?” Alberto answered quickly, always there for Louis.

“I do, I need your help, can you book a flight to an island, private, set it to leave tomorrow? Two tickets, 5 days, please.”

“Getting him back?” Alberto asked and Louis could sense the smile in his voice.

“Gonna try my damnedest.” Louis replied

“Got it lad, pick you two up tomorrow, I’ll send you the details once I’ve got it finalized, go get him, he loves you.” Alberto replied before hanging up.

Louis smiled as he took a deep breath and made his way downstairs to his car, driving to the market where he knew he'd find the shops he needed. 45 minutes later he was racing back to his house, only about 30 minutes remained before Harry was set to return home and he had to work fast. He ran from his car into the kitchen and sat the bags down, putting the food out on the counter and taking the other bags to their bedroom. He laid flower petals over the clean white sheets, and placed candles around, lighting them until the room smelt like heaven and he knew Harry would love it.

Louis had a bouquet of flowers that he walked back into the kitchen and left on the dining room table in between two plates and wine glasses. He brought a bucket of ice to chill the wine with before he walked to the counter and placed fresh fruit and salad on one plate, and steak and mash on the next. He walked back to the bedroom to take a final look in the mirror when he heard a car pull up into the drive way. He found his iPod and quickly sat it up in the living room with the speakers playing a low sound, a song that he’d written with Harry, one just for them...and the playlist it was set on was full of songs that had meaning, ones that would narrate their evening, saying the things Louis might forget in his attempt to fill Harry’s heart and mind with promises and love again, things he’d long since abandoned.

He heard Harry fidgeting with the door, no voice accompanied him which meant Niall hadn’t walked him up to the house, maybe he knew Louis wanted to see Harry alone, and when he finally saw the door begin to move he felt his nerves send him into a panic and he walked down the hallway, staying just out of sight. Harry let out a gasp when he saw the space, the flowers, the plates sat out with dinner, he heard the song playing and he shut the door slowly. He was quite drunk but he had a smile, the kind that let his beautiful dimples show and Louis watched him for a moment before clearing his throat and stepping into the room.

“Harry.” Louis spoke.

“Louis, what..what’s this?” Harry asked trying not to slur his words.

“For us. For you.” Louis replied, looking nervously at Harry, trying hard to read him.

“You didn’t....you shouldn’t have.” Harry took off his coat and laid it on the sofa before he made his way to the table. “Looks delicious though.” He smiled.

“Wanted to eat with you, spend just a little time before you got ready to leave.”

“ ‘s nice, yeah.” Harry replied, motioning for Louis to join him.

Louis took a deep breath before sitting in the chair across from Harry, nervously fidgeting with his fork before Harry reached an arm across the table to steady him.

“Gimmie.” Harry said as he pulled the fork from Louis hand and pulled the plate towards his own. He began cutting Louis’ steak with equally shaky hands but somehow he had control, as he always managed to. Harry smiled up at Louis as he pushed the plate towards him and placed the fork back in his hand.

“Better?”

“Thank you.” Louis replied sheepishly, before taking a bite to stop himself from the string of IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou that was threatening to come out of his mouth. The two shared a quiet dinner, no more noises than the sipping of wine and the fork hitting nearly empty plates before Harry spoke.

“Louis...I...” but Louis cut him off

“Harry, just...go sit on the sofa for me, okay? Let me clean up and I’ll be right in.” Louis pulled Harry’s chair out before guiding the younger boy out of it so he could make his way to the living room, finding his favorite spot on the large sofa he ordered since they spent so much of their time with their limbs intertwined when they were at home. Harry nuzzled into the spot that Louis usually laid and took in the scent of him, trying to hide the fond look on his face.

Louis cleaned the kitchen quickly, rinsing their plates before putting them into the dishwasher and placing the extra food in the fridge, he rinsed out their glasses before pouring more wine for each of them and took a deep breath as he made his way to the sofa.

“I know you’re already quite well off, but I poured you another glass.” Louis said as he reached his hand out to Harry, and Harry just smiled and mouthed thank you before sitting up and pressing the glass against his lips.

“I....you look good Harry.” Louis told him

“Thanks, you also, that shirt... ‘s my favorite.”

“I know, I...I wore it on purpose.”

“What’s all this for Louis?” Harry asked as he leaned forward and placed the glass on a coaster on their table.

“I just, just wanted to spend a little time with you, ‘s all.”

“Yeah...yeah me too.” Harry told him, but instead of falling back into place he remained propped up on his arm, his gaze meeting Louis’ and Louis couldn't help but notice that Harry’s bottom lip was being slowly pulled between his teeth. Louis sat his glass down on the table just as Harry began to speak again.

“Louis I...” but Louis cut him off with a chaste kiss pressed to his lips, he pulled back for a moment, but not far, just enough to catch his breath. It’d been so long since he kissed Harry, too long...and seconds later he pressed into Harry again, this time more passionately. It was all Harry could do to hold himself up as Louis licked at his bottom lip, nibbling at it, begging for entrance and Harry opened up, giving it to him. Louis moaned as his tongue entered Harry’s mouth, exploring familiar space like it was the first time all over again, and in a way it was...the first time he really knew he was fighting for Harry, to win him back..and Harry didn’t know that yet.

“Missed this.” Louis let out breathlessly. “Missed it so fucking much.”

“Me too, Louis fuck...me too.” Harry moaned as he adjusted his body so he was sitting up and pulling Louis on top of him until the smaller boy was straddling his lap and Harry was crashing into him again, their teeth clashing against each other, messy, passionate, needy...everything.

“Room, bed.” Louis murmured as he pulled away, standing up and reaching out a hand to Harry.

“Surprise, close your eyes.” Harry smiled and did as he was told, keeping his eyes closed as Louis led him down the hall. Louis could feel his heart almost beating out of his chest, but he tried to slow his breathing as he led Harry down the hall, stopping right in front of their bedroom door. Louis turned around to look at Harry and raised up on his tippytoes to press a kiss into his lips.

“C’mere.” Louis told him as he pulled him into their bedroom. “Open your eyes.” Louis moved out of the way so he could see.

“Louis...what...it’s beautiful.” Harry told him with wonder in his eyes and a bit of surprise in his voice. “I...the flower petals on the bed, you remembered.”

Harry was grinning from ear to ear now, the dimples in his cheeks so deep Louis wanted to dip his finger inside and make Harry blush, but he just shrugged his shoulders and closed his eyes at the same time as Harry...both drifting off into a distant memory.

 

 

 

> “Look Louis I know it’s crazy but please let’s just try it, you know there have been kinkier and weirder things we’ve experimented with and we both really liked it.
> 
> “You want me to put flower petals on the bed and fuck you into them? Do you really think the color will transfer to the sheets, to your skin...baby you’re a dreamer but come on...in what world will this work?”
> 
> “Our world, it’ll be beautiful, like the time we used body paint, remember the sky you painted across my back, but this time the petals, they’ll bleed onto the sheets and they’ll be a reminder of this forever...you can kiss the spots the different color petals leave on my skin. Just, I want you to Louis...please.”
> 
> “Anything for you, you know that I love you more than the moon and stars Harry, we’ll do it okay, we’ll do it soon.”

 

 

Louis shook himself out of the memory, knowing that soon never came, he’d never granted Harry the simple gesture of making love to him on a bed covered in flower petals...but now, here, this...this was the opportunity, the room for change. He pulled Harry by the wrist and sat them both down on the bed before he began to speak.

“I remember everything Harry, every single moment with you is seared into my memory, into my brain, my heart, my soul...I’ve never forgotten. I’d never want to. You are the reason the sun rises and then sets, you’re the pull of the moon, the sound of the waves, you're the dew in the morning, the breeze in the evening, and every single moment in between and I’m so fucking sorry that it took me this long to act on that. I’ve known since the moment I met you Harry, that you were it for me, and I’m so sorry that I got lost along the way, but I’m here now, I want to be here now, I’m sick of watching my life pass me by, I’m sick of not fucking touching you.” Louis leaned forward and pushed Harry onto the mattress as he climbed on top of him and pressed kisses into his neck, biting the skin there, making Harry shake beneath him.

“Miss you, miss the way you taste.” Louis told him. “Miss the way your skin feels underneath my teeth, the way the bruises show everyone who you belong to. Miss the way you shake when I kiss you here, and here, and here...Miss the way your back arches when my hand presses in here, the way your eyes roll back when I palm against your cock. Fuck. Harry. I missed this, I missed you so much.” Louis wants to keep talking, but he also needs to kiss Harry’s red lips so he brings their mouths together and their tongues tangle into one another as they both pant into the other’s mouth.

Harry is moving his hands up Louis’ side, pressing into his hips and Louis groans at the contact, his back arching a bit but Harry immediately pulls one of his hands to the back of Louis’ neck and keeps him close while the other hand keeps working into the tender spot in his lower abdomen. Harry is smiling now during their kiss, and Louis doesn’t have to open his eyes to know it’s the sly one; the one he gets when he knows Louis is just as hot for this as he is, the one that says even though he’s the submissive one, he could control Louis in a second.

“Missed you too.” Harry finally begins. “Missed the way your mouth feels against my skin, the way your voice sounds in my ears, the way your fingers feel when they’re opening me up, the way your hands flip me over before you grab my hair and pull it back, arching my back, biting into my neck. Miss the way you gasp when you press inside me, how needy you are for it too. Miss the look on your face, the one you have right fucking now like this is the only fucking thing in the world that matters.” Harry pressed into Louis’ kiss again, hard and sloppy and he never wanted anything more.

Louis was in overdrive now, moving quickly to get his hands underneath Harry’s shirt, working it up his abdomen before Harry got the hint to lean forward for a painful second so Louis could get the fabric up over his head. Harry fell back down on the bed as the shirt hit the floor and Louis bit his lip and swallowed as he saw Harry beneath him. He’d been working out, Louis saw him every day but didn’t really look at him, didn’t notice the way his abdomen was more cut, his arms more wide, the tattoos that told their stories stood out more now against the muscles Harry had developed. Louis leaned down and pressed kisses into Harry’s chest, moving down slowly, licking a trail that ended at one of his nipples. Louis brought the bud into his mouth and rolled his tongue around it before bringing his teeth against it and biting it just enough to cause Harry’s back to arch totally off the bed. Harry had a bit of a pain kink usually, but tonight it was more, everything was more, he just needed to feel it harder. Louis responded by moving to the other nipple and instead of licking over it, he brought his teeth to bite against it with more force, and Harry tried to breathe but couldn’t, all he did was throw his head back and scream out Louis’ name. Louis grinned above him and worked his way down Harry’s stomach, licking and biting into the skin until he reached his hips where his tattoos stuck out against his skin.

“Want to take my time with you.” Louis spoke into his skin. “Want to move slow, kiss every inch of your skin, want to lick and bite you until you’re shaking beneath me, unable to take it anymore. Want to tease you here.” Louis told him as he brought his fingers to the button on his jeans, but didn’t release the clasp.

Harry thrust his hips upward, hoping to make Louis move, but he just let his hands rest on the top of Harry’s jeans, his mouth still licking at Harry’s tattoos. Louis giggled at the way Harry was becoming even more restless underneath him...loving the power he had i the moment, wondering why he ever let this escape.

“Louis, Louis. Fuck. Need you.” Harry let out. “Please. please please please.” Harry was begging, the tone of his voice was so needy, so honest, so vulnerable and Louis was eating it up.

“I’ve got you baby. Got you.” Louis told him as he finally unlatched the button at the top of Harry’s jeans and began working them down his legs. He spent some time biting into Harry’s thighs until he found himself being unable to take it anymore either and he needed to get inside of Harry, needed to feel himself being encompassed inside him.

“You’re so beautiful baby. So fucking pretty.” Louis told him as he pulled his jeans off, revealing a naked Harry underneath. “No briefs today?” Louis asked.

“Hoped, hoped I’d be drunk when I got home and you’d wanna touch me, wore the tightest jeans I could find, sheer shirt, tried...wanted...” Harry was getting lost, words harder to find and Louis knew he needed to be comforted.

“You’re perfect baby, always wanna touch you, always wanna feel you. I’m so sorry, so fucking sorry that I made you doubt that. I’ve been all over the world with you Harry but nothing affects me like you, nothing has ever felt like you before.” Louis told him as he crawled back up Harry’s legs and locked eyes with him for a moment before licking at the head of Harry’s hard cock.

“Louis.” Harry let out breathlessly.

“Shh. Baby. ‘s okay.” Louis assured him as he placed a hand on the bottom of his abdomen and brought his lips around his leaking cock.

Louis was good at many things, but this...he sucked Harry’s dick like he was born for it. He made Harry come with his mouth alone so many times, made Harry say the most filthy things, make the most animalistic noises, and all he had to do was use his tongue. Louis lived for this, the way Harry fell apart beneath him. Louis was bobbing his head up and down Harry’s length in a steady rhythm before he swallowed around him and Harry let out a gasp, throwing his hands into Louis’ hair and Louis moaned at it.

“Do it.” Louis told him as he pulled up for just a second. “Fuck my mouth baby.”

Harry shuddered before thrusting his hips forward, working his cock down Louis’ throat, and Louis took it, wanting Harry be in charge of this, and only this, tonight. Wanted Harry to fuck his throat until he couldn’t talk tomorrow, and Harry knew, because the thrusts got deeper and harder and Louis felt Harry tense up so he immediately brought a hand to grasp the base of Harry’s cock and pulled his head up off of him.

“Not yet baby.” Louis told him as he slid up Harry’s body. “Want to fuck you.”

Harry nodded helplessly as he pressed his hands into Louis’ hips, needing to touch him, needing to feel that this was real.

“Can’t believe you’re here, can’t believe you actually did this.” Harry told him, and in a moment of weakness Louis sat up and lost himself in the hopeful tone of Harry’s voice.

“You can’t believe I'm here?” Louis asked.

“Fuck, don’t... ‘m sorry, didn’t mean it like that, just...fuck me Louis, I just meant I’m ready for you to fuck me.” Harry tried to make it sound better but the serious tone wasn't wasted on Louis.

“No, you really meant that you can’t believe I'm here, but that’s okay Harry, ‘m gonna prove it, gonna prove all I want to do is be here, right here, doing this, with you.” Louis promised them both as he crashed into Harry’s mouth again.

Louis brought his hands to Harry’s hips and in a swift move he flipped Harry over so he was lying on his stomach and Louis smiled before crawling down Harry’s back and bringing his hands to Harry’s ass. He kneaded at the skin, bringing his fingers to pull him apart and Louis pressed his face against his warm skin, shoving his tongue inside of Harry, producing a moan from the younger boys lips. He worked his tongue in and out and added a finger until Harry was nearly collapsing into the mattress, Louis using his strength to hold him up until he was wet enough to add another finger, he scissored Harry open slowly, listening to the gasps Harry was letting out between his lips, the begs for Louis to just give him more, the pleasepleaesplease’s and godifuckingmissedyou’s...and when Louis stuck a third finger in Harry fell into the bed.

“Harry, your skin.” Louis told him as he looked at the younger boy, and he'd been right, the flower petals had leaked onto him, marking him up with different colors, blues and pinks, greens and yellows, purples and reds.

“Fuck, Harry, the sheets, the sheets are colored too. You were fucking right, it’s...you’re...it’s beautiful.” Harry just purred at Louis words and instead of wasting more time Louis spit into his palm and Harry got back up, supporting his own weight so that Louis could fuck into him.

“Love you. God Harry I fucking love you so much.” Louis told him as he pressed kisses against Harry’s back as he slicked himself up.

“You. Louis you’re everything.” Harry spoke quietly, still sort of existing in the moment but above it too somehow.

Louis finally got himself slick enough to line up with Harry’s opening and tease his hole, he pressed against it without pressing inside until Harry was moaning.

“Wanna hear you.” Louis told him.

“Please; Louis. Fuck me.” Louis pressed inside of Harry hard, bottoming out immediately. “

Fuck. Thank you.” Harry moaned and Louis tried to stifle a laugh, who said thank you at a time like this?

Louis built a rhythm, fucking in and out of Harry passionately, angling his cock so that he would hit Harry’s prostate effortlessly, and Harry began to fall apart beneath him again, he was close to an orgasm within seconds but they both wanted it to last, so Harry tried to last longer and Louis began to move slower, which was making it harder on each of them. “Wanna feel you forever.” Harry told him.

“You. Fuck, you too Harry.” Louis said as he pulled out slowly, almost completely, before pressing in again, even more slowly.

“Please, please I need more.” Harry begged. Louis listened as he brought a hand up to tangle in Harry’s hair and he pulled it back so Harry’s neck was exposed, Louis quickly brought his mouth to the skin and bit in again. “Yes, fuck daddy yes.” Harry gasped at the slip of the word and Louis froze, it’d been months since Harry was here, months since he’d called Louis daddy...but it was what they both needed because Harry felt Louis’ hand release his hair and both of Louis’ hands immediately press into Harry’s hips for leverage as he fucked into him relentlessly...within seconds Harry was coming, untouched, with Louis’ name falling out of his mouth and when Harry clenched tightly around him, Louis came too, words failing him except for

“Yes, baby. fuck.” Louis collapsed on top of Harry and sent them both into the mattress, Harry’s skin was clammy under him and Louis knew he should get a flannel to clean them both up, so he slowly pulled out of the younger boy and walked to their bathroom, grabbing one wet, one dry, and walking back to the bed. Harry had rolled over, out of the come on the mattress and Louis wiped Harry’s stomach off, before rubbing over his cock and then cleaning the spot on the mattress. He threw the soiled towel on to the floor and used the dry one to wipe Harry’s skin, followed by his own, and he laid it over the wet spot on the bed. Harry was lying down still, on his side and Louis laid behind him, wrapping his arms around the younger boy, burying his face in Harry’s curls.

“I missed this.” Harry whispered as he turned to face Louis.

“I love you so much.” Louis saw tears building up in Harry’s eyes and when one fell out, many more followed, Harry was sobbing in his arms and Louis was biting his tongue, trying to remain strong. He gained enough strength to get through what he knew he needed to say. “Harry. I love you, I’m in love with you, it’s never changed. I don’t know where I went for the last few months, don’t know what head space I was in, but we were all, we were miserable, and I just...I know I shut you out and I’m so fucking sorry. I never meant to hurt you, all I ever want to do is protect you Harry, from everything, sometimes I want to save you so bad I think I end up hurting myself. I love you so much, with everything I have, every part of me belongs to you.” Louis spoke into Harry’s hair as his face remained buried into the crevice of Louis’ neck.

A few moments later Harry’s breathing was shallow and Louis knew he’d fallen asleep. He reached over him slowly to look at his phone where Alberto had left the flight information. Louis sent him a quick thank you before bringing Harry in for a closer cuddle, they laid together for an hour before Louis thought Harry was asleep deep enough for him to move without waking the curly haired boy. So he moved his arm out from underneath of Harry, placing a pillow there instead and slowly moved off of the mattress. He blew out the candles that had all but gone out on their own, and began to pack things into a suitcase. A few of the shirts they shared, pants for both of them, briefs, socks, a few pairs of shoes and some joggers before he zipped it up and laid it down, he found their passports and laid them on top before crawling back into bed with Harry, wrapping his arms around him tightly and whispering into his hear how good he was, how perfect and warm and lovely and how much Louis just needed him. Louis set the alarm on his phone for 3 and a half hours later before he finally allowed himself to drift off to sleep too.

“Louis, your phone.” Harry grumbled as he pulled a pillow over his head to try to block the noise.

“No. Not yet. No way.” Louis groaned as he reached, eyes closed, for the phone.

“What bloody time is it?” Harry asked

“It’s 6, it’s 6 and we have to be up now, have to shower.” Louis told him.

“No, no. Gonna stay in bed with you here all day.”

“Can’t, gotta go.” Louis told him, and Harry sat upright and looked at Louis with lost eyes.

“You’re leaving?” Harry asked him, and suddenly there wasn’t a blanket big enough to cover his insecurities...but he wrapped it around himself anyway and closes his eyes, scared to read the response on Louis’ face.

“No no no. Harry no.” Louis rubbed the sleep out of his own eyes to look at Harry and pull him in. “I’m not leaving, not going anywhere without you. We. Both of us. We’ve got to shower and get out of here. Alberto will be here in 20.”

“Wh...wa...why?” Harry finally asked. “Taking you; taking you away.” Louis told him, all of a sudden more nervous than he’d ever been.

“Taking me, where?”

“A hidden little place, just the two of us.” Louis was scared to look up at Harry so he kept his gaze down, but he felt a warm hand come underneath his chin and raise his face up slowly.

“We’re going away...together?” Harry asked with a smile so big Louis thought his face must be hurting.

“If you’ll come with me.” Louis responded, hopeful but scared.

“I’d follow you anywhere Louis Tomlinson.” Harry told him as he made his way off the bed, grabbing Louis and pulling him out of bed.

The boys showered quickly, threw on some clothes and slipped into a pair of shoes before Louis grabbed the suitcase and passports and made their way into the living room. Alberto was already waiting outside so Louis shut off the lights and locked the door before ushering Harry out.

“Harry, good to see you.” Alberto told him as he got out of the car to help the boys in. Harry threw himself into Alberto’s arms for a hug that made them both smile.

“Missed you.” Harry told him quietly.

“Knew he’d figure it out soon enough.” Alberto whispered back and threw a wink at Harry before taking the suitcase from Louis and putting it in the trunk.

Louis and Harry got in the back seat, fingers intertwined as the car drove them to the airport. Alberto opened their door as they arrived at the destination and spoke to Louis quickly.

“I know you’re still on break for a little over a month, so I booked you 10 days instead, turn your phones off, I’ll let Niall and Liam know what’s going on, I’ve already emailed your parents, just...disconnect okay, find each other again? I’ll be here when you get back.” Alberto promised and Louis hugged him and told Alberto he’d never be able to thank him enough.

Harry just got out of the car and smiled as they made their way inside, not hiding the fact that they were catching a flight together. Security quickly took note of who they were and with Alberto’s guidance they snuck the boys to the plane without them being noticed by too many travelers. There were a few who snapped photos and yelled their names and Louis and Harry just waved in response. Louis and Harry took their seats on the aircraft as the guard dropped them off.

“Holiday?” A blonde asked Harry.

“Surprise for me, still not quite sure where we’re headed.” Harry replied.

“You’ll see soon enough, for now, sleep babe.” Louis told him as he pulled him in close.

5 hours later they arrived at their destination and Louis took his time waking Harry up.

“Harry, baby, we’re here.” Louis told him as he peppered his face in kisses. “Wake up for me love.”

“ ‘m sleepy, sleep with me Louis. Need sleep.” Harry replied.

“No baby, we’re here, we can sleep inside, but...come in first. Gotta get up enough to walk inside.” Louis told him and Harry groaned but opened his pretty green eyes and stretched like a kitten before standing up.

“Take me to bed Louis.” Harry told him as he pulled Louis up.

“You two go ahead, someone’s waiting for you outside.” The flight attendant told them, and Louis was surprised to see Preston waiting on the sand of the beach.

“I know it’s a private island, but Alberto asked me to look after you two and I have to admit, this is a nice break for me too.” He smiled at the boys after they got off the plane.

Louis pulled Preston in for a hug and asked him a question under his breath. “Did Alberto get it taken care of?”

“All done, paper is inside on the counter.”

“So it’s....really?”

“Yes, got it all taken care of this morning.”

“I can't thank you enough.” Louis told him.

“No thanks owed to me, but if you want to do anything, take that boy to bed, he looks like he wants to devour you and I love the both of you but I could live without seeing that. There’s a guest home where I’ll be staying, if you need anything just dial the number, there’s a list of them by the phone in the kitchen.” Preston waved to Harry before walking up towards the beach home and Louis turned to the boy with the curls and extended his arm.

“Coming baby?”

“Hope to be.” Harry replied with a wink.

The boys made their way up to the house and Harry could have cried right then, it was magnificent. Big glass windows everywhere, they could see the entire island from their living room, an open kitchen with a big island so that Harry could cook. A large tv attached to the wall, video game console already there, wall lined with movies and games and albums. There was a record player and a polaroid camera too and Harry ran to it immediately.

“Smile Lou.” Harry told him as he snapped a photo. “Lovely.” Harry reached out and handed the photo to Louis and he saw himself develop with a dopey grin on his face.

“There’s one more surprise.” Louis told him.

“....what is it?” Harry asked, nervous again.

“Go look on the counter, there’s an envelope there...has your name on it.”

Harry walked into the kitchen and saw a manilla folder with Harry Styles written on the front. He opened it and pulled out the papers and Louis watched as tears welled up in his eyes and his hand came up to cover his mouth.

“Louis...how...how did...” Harry couldn’t speak, he just couldn’t form the words...but Louis, he knew.

“I spent too much time being wrong Harry, too much time knowing what you needed and not giving it to you. I took for granted that you'd be here, that you’d be waiting for me, and I know you were close to leaving Harry, I know because I found the box under our bed, I read the letters, 10 of them and I knew, I knew I was a second away from losing you and I couldn’t bare it. I had no idea I’d turned into a shell of myself, no idea I’d let you think for months that you weren't the center of my universe, you were, I was just pained and I was taking it out on you. What’s in your hands is a promise Harry...this is a promise, that no matter what is going on around us, no matter where we’re going or what continent we’re on, no matter who is pulling me right and you left...it’s a promise that this exists, that there is a place on this planet that belongs to you and I...there is a place for us. I know we’ve been made to feel like there’s no where on Earth we could be happy, no where we’d be accepted together, but that place exists, it’s here, and it’s yours.” Louis was crying too, tears falling from his eyes as he saw the realization of what Louis said creep onto Harry’s face.

“You bought us a place to feel safe.” Harry stated and Louis nodded in response.

Harry walked over to Louis and pressed against him, knocking Louis onto the sofa as they fell on it together. Harry was kissing into Louis’ mouth, slowly but with passion.

“Make love to me.” Harry spoke into Louis’ ear. “Take me to the bedroom and drive me crazy.” Louis nodded as Harry stood up, pulling him up again and Louis took charge, pulling Harry towards the bedroom, the sheets were crisp and white, the duvet on top was full and soft as Louis laid Harry down on it.

Louis pulled Harry’s white t-shirt off and worked his joggers down his legs. Louis stripped himself of his clothes too before he crawled on top of Harry and began kissing him slowly.

“Never gonna need anything more than this.” Louis told him.

In a matter of moments Louis had two fingers pressed inside of Harry, working them in and out incredibly slow, making Harry all but cry underneath him. Louis curled his fingers until he hit Harry’s prostate and the younger boy screamed his name.

“Right there Louis, yes.”

“I know baby, I know.”

“Please, please...need to feel you.”

Louis nodded and spit into his palm again, slicking up his cock while his eyes stayed staring into Harry’s

“Love you so much.” Louis told him as he lined up with Harry’s hole and pressed slowly inside. He let Harry take him inch by inch before he had taken him entirely and Louis let his head fall back. “You’re incredible.”

Harry smiled at the compliment and brought his hands to Louis’ hips, this time just resting them there gently, allowing Louis’ hips to guide his hands. Louis worked himself in and out of Harry slowly, deliberately missing his prostate at first, wanting them to feel this for a while, the slow burn...the build up...the sensation overwhelming them until they couldn’t take it anymore. Harry was shaking beneath Louis as he drug himself almost totally out before pressing all the way in again, working so slowly Harry thought he might go crazy.

“You feel so good.” Louis let out.

“You too Louis, I could...God you could fuck me forever, just like this, and I’d be happy.”

“Want to. Never want to stop.”

So he didn’t. Louis didn’t stop driving Harry crazy for an hour, working them each to the brink of an orgasm and stopping it, before stating it all over again, working Harry back up until he was begging for it.

“Please, wanna come, wanna feel you come inside me.” Harry let out breathlessly and Louis nodded, angling himself perfectly to start pressing into Harry’s prostate, working his hips a little faster. He hit the spot once, twice, and on the third time Harry arched his back and came with LouisLouisLouis on his lips, and the way he clenched tightly around Louis made him come too, HarryHarryHarry on his.

Louis moved to get a flannel but when he pulled out Harry just pulled him in.

“Don’t go, we’ll clean up later.” Harry told him.

“Okay. Don’t wanna go, wanna stay here.” Louis replied, sleepy, into Harry’s chest.

“This is ours.” Harry smiled.

“Ours.” Louis replied. “Paradise.”

“Ours.” Harry stated. “Ours.”

 

Harry woke up a few hours later, Louis still asleep at his side so he pressed a kiss into Louis' hair and made his way to the living room.  He searched the drawers until he found a pad of paper and a pen and poured a glass of orange juice from the fridge before sitting down to write.

 

_My Dearest Louis,_

_You're asleep in our bed, in our home, on our island.  Ours, four letters, one word...and my heart, my mind, my soul is complete again.  I have never been more in love with you than I am in this moment, you drive me crazy but you keep me grounded in the same breath, I never knew that was possible, not until I met you.  I have loved you long before I met you, you were a part of me before I laid eyes on you.  My story was meant to link with yours, you complete the parts of me that were empty and you enhance the parts of me that were already full.  You have brought so much joy into my life, so much happiness into my soul, so much love into my heart.  I am in awe of who you are, of everything you've become and how gracefully you handle anything thrown your way.  I was moments away from leaving, and now I realize I could never rid myself of you, and I'd never want to.  A box of letters hidden under our bed brought us back together, brought us here, so this letter is one for you, out of hiding, to let you know that no matter where life takes us, no matter how lost we get, I promise that I'll leave a trail to lead you back to me.  The trail will lead us here, this is healing for us Louis, this is love and light and hope...this is the place we'll spend our secret vacations, the place we'll take our first one once we can finally tell the world of our love.  I imagine little feet pattering against the floor in the future when we visit here with our kids, I can see it all now, the two of us raising up heroes._

_You are mine._

_And I am forever yours._

_Sincerely, always,_

_H._


End file.
